Timing is everything. Or is it?
As you may know, I have been a stay at home mom for 10 years! I did work for the family business, but my family was always with me…so I can’t really count that! Well, recently I decided to work so I can get my feet wet in the education system. I adore working with children and watching them grow, but it didn’t last long at all.
I accepted a position in a school with the acceptance of my youngest in a 3-year-old program. After weeks of trying to adjust to the change, my daughter wasn’t ready for that sort of environment. Out of my five children, she was the only one who started public education at 3. I’d figure it was a great opportunity for the both of us, but boy was I wrong. I appreciate the efforts of the school for giving her the chance, but as a mother who successfully taught my children everything in preparation for school, I felt I had to go back to what worked for my children. They can only stay little for so long and even though I miss working with my new babies, I cannot revert what I’ve instilled and taught my now 4-year-old daughter.
I remember my first day back at home… dishes were washed and breakfast was prepared; The thoughts ran through my head about all the children that were impacted by my presence and how I am doing a disservice not being there with them. I was thinking about how much I loved those little babies as if they were my own, then my daughter (not knowing what I was thinking) said, “But Mommy, I need you!” WOW!! It left me in complete shock. I didn’t expect that at all!! God revealed to me that I am still making an impact and that my role as a stay at home mom was just as valuable. I AM VALUABLE!! I felt defeated for leaving so soon, but as a mother, you can’t sit around and watch your child go through.
So for now, I’m home! I am happy! I do feel emotional sometimes because I think about all of my preschoolers and if they are happy! But God’s way is perfect and He knows what He’s doing. I will continue to love on babies and take care of my own. My baby girl will be ready for school when she’s ready.
Coming back home made me appreciate my role as a wife and stay-at-home mommy! I’d sometimes question my value, my worth and now that I see how much my family thrive with me being home, I see my value, my importance. Although my husband affirms me (ALL.THE.TIME) I still have the thought in the back of my head that I have so much more to offer to the world. I do!! But not to the extent I had in mind! Changing the world starts at home… by raising God-fearing, loving, well-versed and respectful children; something this world hasn’t seen in a long time.
As a parent, you know that we are always learning and growing when raising children. There’s no perfect way to raise them. We must listen to the Lord and just flow with it…. use discernment..pray. It’s been three months (give or take) since I resigned and Rebekah is back to her normal environment. She’s thriving and learning so much! Seems as if she never missed a beat! I am doing what I found to be best for my little ones to prepare them for school. My to-do lists are still quite full, but it’s getting there! 🙂 For now, I am enjoying this time back at home and I know that I will continue to make a difference…starting at home!