In the Life of a Virtuous Woman
In the middle of yet another EXCRUCIATING, frustrating, exhausting conversation with my almost 20-year old daughter, I realized we just donâ€™t understand each other. We are not communicating, weâ€™re just talking. And worse, she has no idea what Iâ€™m talking about and thinks I have no idea what Iâ€™m talking about! She doesnâ€™t even care to listen to me. I never want to say â€œIâ€™m 46 and Iâ€™m right.â€ But the fact is, Iâ€™M 46 AND Iâ€™M RIGHT! Iâ€™ve been there done that and failed miserably at it. When I looked at her all I saw was myself at 20 making all the wrong moves, having the wrong attitude and not thinking like someone on the path to being a productive adult. So, I began to think how much better off I would be if I knew then what I know now and what things I would want my 20 year old self (and my almost 20 year old daughter) to know.
What I would tell my 20 year old self:
1. Listen more, talk less.
2. It’s ok to be wrong about something.
3. Be good to yourself.
4. Save/spend your money carefully. Don’t try to keep up with the Jones’…the Jones’ are in debt.
5. Take responsibility for your bad behavior (choices, decisions, actions, etc.)
6. Forgive…..yourself and others.
7. Know your worth and walk in it. Don’t settle.
8. Dream big. But wake up, get up and actually DO SOMETHING to make your dreams happen. No excuses, just results.
9. There’s a big difference between taking a “leap of faith” and “taking a flying leap”. Choose wisely.
10. Think. Then react.
11. It’s OK to ask for help. But remember to show gratitude not attitude. YOU need the help.
Thanks Tracie for your continual support and posts on my blog!
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A word I thought Â I would have never said a few years ago. Yes, I am married with a handful of babies, but you wouldn’t catch me in any such conversation. But, now is a different story! I grew up where no one talked about it, but EVERYONE did “IT”. My eyes have also see things that scarred me, but that is only because it wasn’t shown any respect or class. I am talking about sex. God created sex ONLY for one man and his wife to enjoy and to create. But why are CHRISTIANS so afraid to speak up about it?! Sex was created for married Christians! The world is unafraid and bold when it comes to sexuality, but the people whom sex was created for is silent and embarrassed. Well, not anymore!!
I was 19 years old when I got married and up until recently, I was afraid to engage into conversation about sex, even with my own husband! Sad, I know! There are a lot of people who are stepping into marriage blindly because someone was too embarrassed to be real with them. SEX IS NOT A BAD WORD!! Sex is a very spiritual and submissive act between husband and wife that has been abused by the world AND ignored by the church!
In marriage, sex is for creating but it is also for pleasure. Sex should not be a chore….it should be something you enjoy intimately with you husband or wife. BUT do not expect it to be your only form of expression for your spouse. Have date nights, text each other or write notes! Yes, people still do that…I still do that!… Surprise visits at the job. These small tokens help to enhance your marriage. Intimacy does not begin in the bedroom. Intimacy is a relationship. You can’t KNOW your husband or wife unless you know them. Same with Jesus; He is longing to spend time with you and to know you. You can’t know Him without a relationship!
Speaking of the bible, have you ever sat down and read/listen Song of Solomon? Oh my my!!! Talking about deep! Give it a go! Now i will not give you my interpretation of the book, but I will express ways to create sparks in your relationship with your husband or wife in the next post to this series!
Yes! Surprised? Well don’t be. Many of you feel the exact same way.
Recently, I discovered that my biggest influence, my online pastor, my role model, Pastor Bob Coy of Calvary Chapel in Ft. Lauderdale, Florida had resigned April 3, 2014 as Head Pastor for “moral failure”….simply put, for admitting adultery and porn addiction. I was and still is in disbelief of the news. All I wanted to do is hear a Word as I have in the past from him on his Activeword.org website to find all of his materials and archivesÂ gone. I am absolutely disappointed and am hurt to know that the person whom I received “counseling” from all these years, has committed the sin he speaks against all the time! Yes, he is only a man, but if you could only hear his passion (what now may have been a cry for help) about marriage saying, “our marriages and ministries are under attack” “guard your relationships” “don’t take family for granted”. He wasn’t your typical Megachurch Pastor who only told people what they want to hear; he spoke Bible! Pastor Coy backed up EVERYTHING with scripture and I supported him. Now why am I sick of the church? Well, that’s simple!
For years, the church has becomeÂ an all you can eat buffet; a place where people come to stuff there faces with food with no limit. They are becoming sick because of the mess they consume and choose to indulge in. It is no longer a hospital for the sick and lame, but it has become the place where sinful people come to be reassured about their situation and not change a thing because the Grace of God will rescue them each and every time!
Pastors are living “secret lives”, their messages are no longer life-changing but more of a “Wa“. People are leaving millions of churches empty. The creation usually represents the creator, so if the pastor is living an empty life, he can only pour into people what he has inside of him.
No one talks about sin, because everyone is covering up theirs. Pastors being excused of adultery, pornography, theft, and an array of things. Usually, when their sin is brought to light, they are “praised” and encouraged saying the devil won’t steal our joy.Ha! Your pastor just got caught up Â WITH EVIDENCE and you’re defending him? While pastors like Bob Coy confess because the Holy Spirit is yet working on him and is convicting him so he confesses and people are calling him a “false teacher”? It bothers me! If anything he is forgiven.
Th church has become lukewarm in everything and even questioning the bible they are suppose to live by for the sake of comfort and numbers. I feel as if I don’t want to be apart of that group of people everyone is talking about. My standard is the bible! The bible is my road to life everlasting and my light will be seen, but it feels like if I am with a bunch of watered down Christians, that I will be looked at as the same. I know that out of all the madness the church is allowing, there are a FEW in the church who remains and will stand on the Word of God, who will not give in to the culture that the church is allowing to influence them. Every person I come in contact to will know and SEE the difference.
I have never felt this type of sympathy for the church like I do now. I am on a mission and God will get the glory out of every aspect of my life!
Be the difference, even in the church. Timeout for playing church! Souls need deliverance and conviction!